Naruto Lounge
by EvilFuzzy9
Summary: A collection of stories about the life of the characters offscreen. Leave me challenges in your reviews, if you want. Warning: Ooc'ness, evil plots, and blankies! Yay! Kisame minific inside! Rating upped for safety! Please review! On Hiatus.
1. Dolls

Naruto Lounge

EF9: Well, this idea has been floating around my head for a while. So I decided to write it. Gomen, please forgive me for not updating Invader Naruto or Another Day, but as they are chaptered fics and I am not skilled at speed typing (Not to mention I have trouble getting enough ideas to fill a page, on average,) I might take awhile.

Kyuubi: Meaning you're to lazy.

EF9: That's cruel man, just, cruel.

DEF666: This is one of those drabble fics, with a different short-story in each chapter, as such they do not affect each other, plot-wise. Kyuu-meister, disclaimer.

Kyuubi: EF9 doesn't own Naruto, and he probably never will.

EF9: But a guy can dream. BTW they are like cartoon-actors in case ya get confused, yeah, but I'll keep their relationships with one-another in mostly the same manner.

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It was a fine day, the members of the show's team 7 and team 8 had finished shooting early, so the director gave them the rest of the day off, and then Kiba treated the ones who had worked that day to pizza and bowling.

Yes sir, this was great day and it was about to get better, Kakashi had asked Kurenai on a date and they left teams 7 and 8 at the café, (SEINFELD STYLE! Sorry.)

"Hey Dobe, why don't you, Hinata, and Kiba go to the park, and let me and Sakura have some _alone-time_."

"What? And leave Hinata with those two! ARE YE DAFT MAN?" shouted Sakura hitting Sasuke upside the head.

"Well actually, I have to take Akamaru to the v-e-t." said Kiba.

"Arrf rwowf," which in dog means 'I can spell better than you.'

At that correction by Kiba, an evil smirk crept upon her lips.

"Oh, so it will be just Hinata and Naruto. Then by all means, go ahead."

"Uh… okay." Said the confused blonde. Confused by what? You ask, why, many things; like how Kakashi could have gray hair? And why is Tsunade-baachan always tired? And why are his clothes orange? (XD Not even he knows!) But he complied like a good boy. (Tobi: Achoo!)

Later, when they got to the park, they saw Gaara in the sandbox making sand-figurines (they still have their ninja powers) and Temari trying to flirt with a sleeping Shikamaru, but what she doesn't know won't make her hurt him. Naruto said the first thing that came to mind.

"Where's doll-boy?" At this something incredible happened, Gaara no sabaku, laughed. Not a snicker or a chuckle, but a full-blown roll-on-the-ground-until-you-cry-from-from-laughing laugh!

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EF9: Well there is the first one. And feel free to include a challenge in your reviews!

Kyuubi: Subliminal messages, not bad.

EF9: Thanks!

Kyuubi: But not impressive either.

DEF666: Review.


	2. Cults

EF9: Wah! I didn't get any reviews!

Kyuubi: There, there, you big baby, I'm sure someone will review. _Or so help me, I'll crush them, I need my peace and quiet._

DEF666: EF9 doesn't own Naruto.

EF9: WWAAHH!

Kyuubi: Start the story.

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Deidara, Hinata, and Anko had gathered for the monthly meeting of the Society of Creepy, Shy, and/or Psychotic Naruto Stalkers, or S.C.S.P.N.S., for short. The room they were in was dark and lit by a sole hanging light bulb.

"Now to report the minutes of the last meeting, the club scribe, Viper."

"Arigatou, Bunny-sama. Minutes 1-7: Member Boomboom elects to place hidden cameras throughout subject Fox-_Man_'s residence, for research purposes, and proposes a vote. Minutes 8-11: Votes are tallied by member Teme-san, who then gets membership suspended for failing to install said cameras. Minutes 12-43: members Bunny, Windy, and Violet are on surveillance mission. Member Windy suspended for being caught by the subject, and member Violet suspended for abandoning mission to argue with subject Pinky. That is all."

" Good, now I propose we think of a way to _silence_ those who attack subject Fox-Man, and reject member Teme's membership permanently." Said Deidara who was putting lipstick on the palm of her hands.

Hinata, who was dressed in a purple and yellow version of the Hokage robes, wrote a reminder on the scroll she was carrying. "Okay, now I say that we recruit some more members, to plan subject Fox-Man's birthday party, all in favor say aye."

"Aye."

"Aye."

"Aye."

Just then a light clicked on, revealing the room to be a bathroom, and Naruto stepped in, looking like he really had to go. "Read the sign." He said as he escorted the ladies out, pointing at a yellow sign on his front that read '_All cults wishing to meet in this apartment must consult Naruto a week before the meeting and bring the payment decided by Naruto to the meeting to pay the fee. Any dooms-day cults must pay 500 dollars to meet in the apartment.'_

"Oh yeah, I forgot." Said Anko scratching the back of her neck nervously while the other two sweat-dropped.

"Now you have to pay a fine of 1000 dollars." Naruto said matter-of-factly. And where the three girls stood was a cloud of dust. " Gets 'em to leave every time." He then sat down to enjoy some pocky he had snatched as part of training, grinning like a fox the whole time.

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EF9: Hope you liked this installment of Naruto's lounge.

Kyuubi: Review or I'll sic the twerp on you.

DEF666: And flames will be used to burn Kakashi's books, which will be blamed on any and all flamers.

TTFN!


	3. Kisame's Adventure Part 1!

**Kisame Hoshigaki's Adventure!**

EF9: Welcome everybody! It's Shark Week on discovery channel!

Kyuubi: So in honor of Shark Week, we are doing a chapter about the most under-appreciated shark man in Naruto!

DEF666: Sigh. Kisame Hoshigaki. Whatever.

EF9: Now to do our disclaimer, the shark named number one most dangerous by Discovery Chaanel, the bull shark!

Bull Shark: Glub gurgle splish grr. (EF9 doesn't own Naruto.)

LINE

Kisame woke up at 5:00 am, yawning drowsily and rubbing his eyes free of gunk. Looking at his goldfish centerfold calendar, he saw the day's date marked, with a message scrawled in red ink._ Shark Week!_ Was all it said.

Kisame (Blinking stupidly for a few moments before gasping in realization): _Whoa! That fish is hot! …Oh yeah and it's Shark Week._ SHARK WEEK? ALRIGHT!

On the other side of the base Itachi, who was just having a nice dream where Deidara gave him a kiss for his birthday, woke with a start.

Itachi: _My foolish brother senses _TM_ are tingling._

Okay, so maybe he isn't _that_ smart. Anyways back with Kisame, who has finished changing out of his Finding Nemo pajamas.

Kisame (Running out into the hallway): Yes! I'm ready, I'm rea- OOF! (He runs into a black cloaked venus flytrap.)

Zetsu: Oh sorry. **Watch where you are going, lunch.**

Kisame: Gulp. Y-yes Z-zetsu-sama.

Kisame decided to go to the kitchen and prepare breakfast. But when he got there he realized they were out of cereal. So he went to AL's room, to ask for permission to go shopping.

Kisame (Opening door then staring in disgust at-): AL-sama? What are you doing?

AL (Looking up from ravishing Yugito Container of the nibi, remember?) What?

Kisame: What are you doing to the jincuuriki?

Yugito (standing up and straightening out her kimono): What? He said he'd let me go if I made out with him. (Points at AL Which in case you haven't figured out stands for Akatsuki Leader)

AL: Uh… I did no such thing? (Chuckles nervously and scratches the back of his head)

Kisame (Looking thoroughly creeped out): Right. Can I go buy some cereal?

AL: Ahem. (Gives Kisame the kind of look a mom gives their kid when they burp and don't say excuse me)

Kisame (Looking more like an annoyed teen than an S-class criminal): Sorry. _May_ I _please_ go to the store and purchase some breakfast cereals, because are out and it is better to get it as soon as possible, rather than wait until people start to complain.

AL (Looking satisfied And no not like _that_ you dirty perverts): Fine. But bring Tobi with you.

Kisame (Downright confused by now): Why Tobi?

AL: Because, now that he is an official member, he must learn how to contribute to the organization.

Kisame: Oh okay. … By the way, you _do_ know you sounded liked someone on one of those pledge drive things, right?

AL: Yes, yes I do.

LINE

EF9: Okay there you have it Part 1 of Kisame Hoshigaki's Adventure.

Kyuubi: Part 1?

DEF666: Yes. Part 1. He is too lazy to do the whole thing in one go.

EF9 (Ignoring my two muses completely): Well. Tell me what you think and give me ideas, and people who give me nice enough reviews might just find them-selves getting a cameo next chapter! Remember reviews inspire us authors to get off our lazy asses and start writing!

TTFN!


	4. Recruitment Notice sorta

EF9: I interrupt the story you are reading for an important message. Kyuubi.

Kyuubi: Yes it has come to our attention that yaoi, shonen-ai, slash, or whatever you call serious gay pairings, in fanfiction, have increased in popularity at an alarming rate.

DEF666: Yes, nothing personal against any rabid yaoi obsessed fan girls, but we straight, semi-decent frequentors of fan fiction dot net, have found it increasingly frustrating how much yaoi there is.

EF9: So we, meaning myself and my muses, have decided that those of us who find boy boy, and the almost nonexistent girl girl, stories distasteful, should stay together, and form a banner under which we can march against yaoi, yuri, and mary-sues.

Kyuubi: We call it the Anti-Yaoi Yuri and Mary-Sue Corps (meaning we oppose yaoi yuri and mary-sues)

DEF666: Although the main subject of this message is Yaoi, the AYYMSC, oppose the three banes of fan fiction.

EF9: So to join my organization, you must pm me and tell me which you wish to oppose: yaoi yuri or mary-sues, you don't have to choose just one, and I will write down your name under membership on my profile.

Kyuubi: And if you may, members of the organization, could you spread the word about the revolution, and suggest joining.

DEF666: And don't forget to bash what you submit yourself as opposing.

All: That is all.

Note: I am serious about this, check my profile if your not sure, although it only mentions yaoi.


End file.
